Happy Monday, Vancouver!

Good news: Vancouver is doing its part to keep civilization going this week.

We're preserving wetlands, learning about recycling, attending science shows, and (most importantly) being reminded that now is probably not the ideal time to set a giant fire in the backyard.

Honestly, we're crushing it.

We've also got reptiles, rockets, terrible art, live music, comedy, farmers markets, and enough free events to make you wonder why anyone ever says there's “nothing to do” around here.

Anyways, here's what to expect in today's edition of The PNW Report (Vancouver):

📰 Local News
☁️ Weather
🎉 Events & Things To Do
🤔 Lateral Thinking Puzzle

Let's get started!

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🔥 The Burn Ban Just Got a Lot More Ban-y

The outdoor burn ban has expanded beyond Vancouver and now covers unincorporated Clark County too. That means no fire pits, campfires, recreational burns, or agricultural burning until conditions improve. Basically, if your weekend plans involve setting something on fire, maybe don’t. This is one of those rare situations where the official recommendation is exactly what your neighbor has been yelling from across the fence: put the fire out.

🌿 Clark County Is Buying 22 Acres Along Salmon Creek…and Honestly, Nature Could Use the Real Estate

Clark County is spending up to $1 million to preserve 22 acres along Salmon Creek, protecting wetlands and habitat that support salmon runs, migratory birds, and plenty of other local wildlife. That works out to roughly $45,000 an acre for land that won’t be turned into another strip mall, apartment complex, or parking lot with a single sad tree in the middle. Sometimes the best development plan is simply: do not develop it.

WEATHER

Eighty is great-y!

Monday, 8/10: 82/57 🌥️ Partly Cloudy
Tuesday, 8/11: 84/60 🌥️ Partly Cloudy
Wednesday, 8/12: 80/57 ⛅️ AM Clouds/PM Sun
Thursday, 8/13: 84/59 🌥️ Partly Cloudy

EVENTS AND THINGS TO DO [8/10 - 8/13]

Looking for something fun to do this week? You’re in the right place! 🎉 

Stay tuned for Thursday morning’s newsletter, where we’ll give the lowdown on all the cool upcoming weekend events!

MONDAY, AUGUST 10th

🎨 Adventures in Art @ Vancouver Community Library | 10:30AM - 12:30PM (FREE)
Feeling a little frayed lately? Come weave your problems away! This month’s Adventures in Art is getting knotty with communal weaving on large looms. No experience is needed and all materials are provided, so you can finally get your thread together.

🏃‍♂️ Run Club @ Foot Traffic | 5:45PM (FREE)
Looking for an excuse to be active but mostly just want to socialize? This run club is 50% chatting, 50% running, and 100% a good time. They meet at the Trader Joe’s on Chkalov, you know, just in case you wanna grab some cheese for the drive home.

🤣 Chicks & Giggles @ Donnell’s | 6PM - 8PM (FREE)
Mondays don’t have to be so miserable…laugh your way into the week at Donnell’s! Grab a drink, find a good seat, and get ready for an evening of raw, unfiltered comedy from some of the funniest locals around.

TUESDAY, AUGUST 11th

🚀 Rocket Launch Lab @ Vancouver Mall | 11:30AM - 1PM (FREE)
Houston, we have an event! The grand finale of Kids Summer Playdates is blasting off at Vancouver Mall with space crafts, galaxy slime, sensory bottles, and hands-on science experiments. Bring your little astronauts to experiment, create, and explore the final frontier…just maybe don’t let them know that the slime is not, in fact, a new NASA fuel source!

🐍 Reptile Man: The Fascinating World of Reptiles @ Firstenburg Community Center | 2PM - 3PM (FREE)
Things are about to get s-s-slightly wild! The Oregon Reptile Man is bringing the creepy, crawly, scaly crew for an up-close look at the fascinating world of reptiles. There will be live reptiles, big laughs, and plenty of opportunities to discover that snakes are actually much cuter when they’re not, like, in the wild making you hiss-terical.

✍️ Shut Up and Write! @ The ARTS Centered | 5:15PM (FREE)
Calling all writers (yes, even you with the half-finished novel hiding in Google Docs)! This is focused weekly writing time to just show up, get words on the page, and meet some fellow word nerds. Write, write, write!

🚲 Urbanism Happy Hour @ Tap Union | 6:30PM (FREE)
Grab your helmet and your happy hour appetite…it’s time for Cycle Vancouver’s Urbanism Happy Hour at Tap Union! Meet fellow two-wheeled enthusiasts, swap stories from the bike lane, and toast to better mobility, stronger community, and fewer potholes.

🎱 Autumn Pinny Cup Tournament @ Silver Ball Social Club | 7PM ($12)
Ready to have a ball? Head over to Silver Ball Social Club for a flippin’ cool pinball tournament. Players will be matched together on teams, regardless of skill levels, so get ready to roll over your opponents!

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 12th

🔬 Gravity Catastrophe: A Science Show @ Cascade Park Community Library | 2PM - 2:45PM (FREE)
Gravity: 9.8 m/s² and still somehow not enough to keep your kids from climbing the furniture. This high-energy science show dives into centripetal force, acceleration, center of mass, vortexes, and the scientific method (parents, have you tuned out yet?) with fog, smoke, and loud noises thrown in for good measure. Come learn exactly why things fall down, spin around, and occasionally go spectacularly wrong. Science!!!

🥬 Camas Farmers Market @ Downtown Camas | 3PM - 7PM (FREE)
It’s summer farmers market season, baby! The Camas Farmers Market runs seasonally from June to September, and lettuce tell you…it’s all that and a bag of produce!

🪡 Open Craft @ Hook & Needle Fiber | 4PM - 7PM (FREE)
For when you’re feeling crafty, but also a little too lazy to follow official directions. Bring your supplies, hang out, and make something beautiful at this open craft session...or a tangled mess. We don’t judge!

🧶 Adventures in Art @ Vancouver Community Library | 4:30PM - 6:30PM (FREE)
Feeling a little frayed lately? Come weave your problems away! This month’s Adventures in Art is getting knotty with communal weaving on large looms. No experience is needed and all materials are provided, so you can finally get your thread together.

🎺 Music Night @ Willful Wine | 5PM – 7PM (FREE)
Sip wine and sway awkwardly at this delightful evening of music and merlot. Willful Wine knows how to pair a Pinot with a trumpet solo. Wine not?!

🃏 Tabletop and Taps @ Vault31 Bar | 6PM (FREE)
Board games are always a good idea. Join your fellow nerds at this board game meet-up and get ready to pwn some n00bs at Catan. Bring your A-game, or just bring yourself and let the dice and drinks (or both?!) decide your fate.

🤣 Comedy Night @ Shanahan’s | 8PM (FREE)
Grab the mic (literally) every Wednesday! In-person sign-ups kick off at 7:30, and the stage lights blaze at 8:00. Hosted by the one and only Sean Grace, this is your chance to shine, stumble, or just watch others do both.

THURSDAY, AUGUST 13th

🥬 East Vancouver Farmers Market @ Columbia Tech Center | 10AM - 2PM (FREE)
It’s summer farmers market season, baby! The East Vancouver version of the Vancouver Farmers Market runs seasonally from June to September, and lettuce tell you…it’s all that and a bag of produce!

🎨 Adult Bad Art @ Vancouver Mall Library | 5:30PM - 6:30PM (FREE)
Perfection is prohibited (yay!!). The goal of this free workshop is to create the worst piece of art you possibly can and then confidently explain your artistic vision to everyone else. Talk about a brush with greatness.

🌴 Summer Nights Sips & Bites @ Downtown Camas | 5PM - 9PM ($25)
Camas is turning up the heat…but thankfully, at this event, the drinks are chilled. This tropical-themed night lets you sip handcrafted cocktails, snack your way through 15+ downtown spots, shop, and collect raffle tickets along the way. Tropical attire is highly encouraged, so dust off that Hawaiian shirt and get ready to tropic like it’s hot!

♻️ Recycling 201 @ City Marine Park Engineering | 6:30PM - 8PM (FREE)
Think you’ve mastered curbside recycling? Take the next step with this RecycleU workshop! Learn how to responsibly recycle or reuse everything from plastic bags to appliances…and even tackle bulky items. Note: Prior attendance in Recycling 101 is required.

🎸 An Evening with Hiroya Tsukamoto @ Three Creeks Community Library | 6:30PM - 7:30PM (FREE)
Want to have a fretful evening? Japanese-born guitarist and composer Hiroya Tsukamoto brings his blend of jaw-dropping guitar skills and heartfelt storytelling to the library for an evening that proves you don’t need a giant concert venue to have a big string theory experience.

🏃‍♀️ Vancouver Run, Grub, and Chug @ The Vancouver Waterfront | 6:45PM (FREE)
Run for your health, and drink for...well, fun. Kind of like a race but with fewer rules and more rewards. This run club meets weekly, so if this is your vibe, guess what? You can do it next week, too!

🎤 Ghost Town Poetry Open Mic @ Art at the Cave | 7PM ($5 suggested donation)
Ghost Town Poetry Open Mic is back! Suggested donation is $5, but if your wallet’s feeling poetically…sparse, no worries…you’re still welcome!

WEEKLY EVENTS

Note: please call or visit each establishment’s website before visiting for a particular event in case details have changed.

BINGO

[MONDAY] Music Bingo Monday @ Ghost Runners Brewery | 7PM (FREE)
[TUESDAY] Bingo @ Grapes n Hops | 6PM (FREE)
[WEDNESDAY] Not Boring Music Bingo @ Fortside Brewing | 6PM (FREE)
[WEDNESDAY] Bar Card Bingo @ Vancouver Elks Lodge | 6PM (FREE)
[THURSDAY] 5 Star Bingo @ Doomsday Brewing Pub | 6PM (FREE)

TRIVIA

[MONDAY] Monday Night Trivia @ Shorewood Restaurant and Bar | 6PM (FREE)[MONDAY] Trivia Night @ Pour Choices Pub | 6:30PM (FREE)
[MONDAY] 5 Star Trivia @ Gossip in the Grain | 6:30PM (FREE)
[MONDAY] Trivia Night @ Thirsty Sasquatch | 8PM (FREE)
[MONDAY] Trivia Monday @ Full Heart Irish Pub | 9PM (FREE) 
[TUESDAY] Trivia Night @ Oak Tree Station | 6PM (FREE)
[TUESDAY] Last Call Trivia @ Tip Top Tavern | 7PM (FREE)
[TUESDAY] 5 Star Trivia @ Playmakers Hazel Dell | 7PM (FREE) 
[TUESDAY] 5 Star Trivia @ JB’s Taphouse and Grill | 7PM (FREE)
[TUESDAY] Trivia Night @ Ole’s Outpost | 7PM (FREE)
[WEDNESDAY] Not Rocket Science Trivia @ Coral Club | 7:30PM (FREE)
[WEDNESDAY] 5 Star Trivia @ Grapes n Hops | 6PM (FREE)
[WEDNESDAY] Last Call Trivia @ Victor23 | 7PM (FREE)
[THURSDAY] 5 Star Trivia @ Doomsday Brewing Pub and Pizza | 6PM (FREE)
[THURSDAY] 5 Star Trivia Night @ Ghost Runner Brewery | 7PM (FREE)
[THURSDAY] 5 Star Trivia Night @ Grady’s Public House | 7PM (FREE)
[THURSDAY] Not Rocket Science Trivia @ Brickhouse | 7PM (FREE)
[THURSDAY] Trivia Thursday @ Breakside Vancouver | 6PM (FREE)

Lateral Thinking Puzzle of the Day

🧠 Time to put your thinking cap on!

Welcome to our Lateral Thinking Puzzle section, where things aren’t always as they seem. Ready to challenge your brain with some tricky scenarios and unexpected twists? Let’s see if you can crack the puzzle!

We’ll give you the answer in Thursday’s edition of The PNW Report (Vancouver)!

Today’s Puzzle: What kind of watch never tells time?